Have you ever had something come up and you instinctively disliked it? Was this dislike based on an actual reason, or was the dislike merely because it wasn’t what you were expecting? Why does something changing have to be about liking or disliking?
Humans have a complicated relationship with change. We can find it disturbing if it comes upon us unexpectedly, but if things stay the same for too long we get bored. If we don’t have any perspective or control over our reactions to the changes in life; than we spend our time constantly rocketing from one reaction to the next, a helpless passenger on the roller coaster of life.
I was told recently that you have to divorce yourself from the outcome of a situation and focus instead on doing your best and that is the only way to come through a troublesome situation unharmed. It was exactly what I needed to hear. The situation I was going through seemed completely dreadful at the time and I really had no control over it, or any way to make the bare facts of it better. The sad part, for me, was that I had been looking forward and working toward this moment for quite some time, and now it here it was and it was not at all what I was expecting. My only option at that point was to try and focus on my attitude toward the situation and not the situation itself and that is what I tried to do. I will admit that I could have done a better job, as it was I stayed pretty distraught about it for a few weeks.
Looking back now my instinct is to be hard on myself for this lapse but that would be starting the cycle over again. So instead of beating myself up and disliking my reaction to this change, I’m gonna think about how to do better next time. Life is never going to stop changing and I’m never going to stop working on myself and those things combined give me something to look forward to. So bring on the change, life, and I will try to see it for exactly what it is, neither good nor bad but possibly exciting!